Being happy with your work life balance.
Do you ever give yourself the pep talk - keep going, one task at a time, things will come good. Stuff like that. I do it a lot, I like to keep my calm so people around me don't catch on and then react by getting in a tizz themselves. But at the moment, I'm struggling to keep the equilibrium. And its showing - I have people asking me if I'm ok. I say yes, but really, lets be honest, I'm struggling. How does it make me feel? Guilty. Why can't I manage this?
I'm working a lot of long hours (averaging over 12 per day) plus I have long travel time to get to work (on a normal days its around 3 hours, but add in trips to the city, Hornsby or Newcastle, and it really jumps). That's around 15 hours a day at work.
As a result, I'm always tired. Which means that things are getting neglected at home. Messy house and everywhere you look, washing piling up and neglecting my family. Friends and relatives don't even make the cut, there is definitely no time to spare for them.
Sleep is difficult. I wake up in a hot sweat on average twice a night thinking about work I haven't done and is on a critical deadline (everything). Plus I get home late and eat late (which is usually take away so I can eat it on the way home), so its hard to get to sleep in the first place. And don't even talk about how much weight I have put on with this crazy stupid eating regime.
Bett is going away in 7 days to USA on her exchange program. It means I have to be there for her meetings and presentations, and Craig isn't often available to take these on. So I've had to go home early a few times. And I feel guilty about this too.
Plus (as if this isn't enough) I've been sick lately. I had to have an operation recently. I went back to work (too early but what do you do - its busy) and I've got some follow up appointments to make sure I'm ok. And I feel guilty about this too because it means more time off. As well as time to go on a cruise in 2 weeks, which I booked at the beginning of the year but regretting it big time - how will I make the time?
How do you manage yourself so that you stay on track and not let it overwhelm you? I am really open for ideas at the moment. I'm not one to vent or even talk about this, but I've been criticised for not speaking up so perhaps I need to open the door to some external thinking.
Would desperately love to hear how you manage work / life balance and the all consuming guilt of being a working parent.
That is all for this post. I know its the first one in a while as I haven't been in the right frame of mind so accept my apologies for the depressing tone, but sometimes you just have to get things off your chest, even if it doesn't make you feel any better. That's the therapy of writing. Hope you have a good night.