Have you ever thought about how you you react in different situations?
For example, when its just normal every day life, how do you act when you need to sort things out, and conversely, what happens when you are stressed?
To give this perspective, when its the weekend and the kids need something, they've left it to the last minute and you need to get it sorted. Think about how you respond then, versus if its a Monday night at 8pm and the same thing happens. I know for me, on the weekend I'm more chilled and relaxed with more time so it probably won't phase me, but on a Monday night after a long day at work and coming home to no dinner cooked and a messy house, I'm most likely going to start yelling.
For me, some situations are a real call out that I get even more stressed when I'm out under pressure. Especially at work but even at home. I can really turn it inwards and make it about me (its my fault, what was I thinking, I'm hopeless) and then it turns into a real downward negativity spiral. It can actually cause a physical reaction too for me, like flushing, feeling hot, getting twitchy and speaking really quickly. I feel like I need to defend and justify whatever has happened.
I hate it when I react like, its a real victim mentality.
But when I'm relaxed, I turn it outwards. I start asking questions like what happened, what can we do, who can help us do it. Its slower pace, much more calm and definitely more confident.
And people definitely respond differently too. When I'm anxious everyone else starts stressing too! and conversely, when I'm chilled people calm down and just get on with whatever needs to happen.
This is a bit of a rambling post but the reason I wrote this was because of something that happened today. I was having brekky with a couple of my fav peeps, and a work situation came up. Straight away I was on the backfoot and it threw me. Sure, it was a problem that had to be fixed but it was my approach that was crap. I know the tools! Take a deep breath and centre yourself, then start.
Perhaps it was the approach. But even that's still a victim attitude. It wasn't about the other person, it was about me and how I let it make me feel.
Obviously still more practice needed but I'm working on it.
Do you ever let other people impact on how you feel and react? How do you manage yourself? I'm really interested in how other people do this, I'd love to learn how to do this better.
All this talk on energy levels came about through me participating in the Energy Leadership session, run by the very smart Babette Bensoussan at Mindshifts, so if you 're interested check her out. I loved it and would recommend it,
God its hard remembering everything all the time! Just take a deep breath, Laurel....